The rose.
Now for some roses might come off as a bit generic. In order not to bore you let us call the rose by the name Lynn. The first time I got to look at Lynn my silly little thoughts were concentrated on a purple color in one of the petals. Purple , a gruesome pigment for my taste, did not look bad on the rose. It was quirky. It was, in some strange way, admiring. It was part of the young nature of the plant, but it held the note of loveliness it could turn into. Now, where was I? Ah yes. When taking into account that my humble self had not one single flower in their garden at the time, I was desperate to show my appreciation for Lynn. I commented on the rose’s distinct feature. All I know is that luck was on my side for Lynn appreciated the vaguely unrooted compliment coming from a stranger. One must know that I was only lucky at that time because the rose too was alone. I like to think it was my charisma, but I am no fool to think that timing was not indeed a dear friend to me.
The seed of connection not so carefully planted by myself turned out to grow faster than any fertilizer could have caused. It seemed natural. The rose began to grow and shine in the morning sun that showed itself each passing day I was with the rose. Now do not haste and think that I immediately put all my trust into this single flower. My insecurities made me try harder, act a bit too controlling in front of it. In some way , during a certain time, I believe Lynn grew wary of me. This, of course is in no way reproachable. I had to add some new plants to the bunch. The garden grew and so did the stress that logically comes with it. I suppose it bugged Lynn to see me struggle to keep up my proper self , while maintaining all the life forms in my garden. If only I knew for sure it would be far easier. I too grew a bit insecure under the rose’s watchful eyes.
Now, if the relationship would only have gone dowhill from there, I surely would not write about the rose right now. The years I have spent with the flower showed me that thorns are present on both sides. But they do not mean any harm. It turned out to be quite the satisfaction, observing each little thorn getting more and more dull over time.
After a period in which I knew nothing but fruitless autumns, there was one flower in the garden which never left my side. Once you fail to appreciate any petal that lands on your ground forgetting yourself becomes quite easy. Blinded by the own sorrow it needs a certain push to motivate yourself to find your way out. Of course this is an overly simplified explanation of a very long term concept, but it should suffice for now. Lynn showed me what stability could be. She had grown new roots and blossoms on her own, all of which looked beautiful in my eyes. If by pity or simple empathy , Lynn took my hand and successfully helped me up from the soil which held no more nutriment for any seed of mine.
Just like that, spring began gaining color again. It is a strange sensation to wake up from the slumber of a long winter again. The music that stopped playing starts again, but with a new rhythm and new meaning. As time went by I was able to see that the roses in the garden were a constant in my life and the most beautiful amongst them grew up to be a wonderful creature. It became easier to open up to this beauty. Every little thought, as obscure as could be , was heard by the rose and it listened to it carefully and mindfully. The little laughs I would get out of Lynn made my day. The feeling of appreciation, I was and am still lucky enough to experience, allowed the sun to shine brighter and the clouds to lift.
Every single incident , that I, ironically or not, spoke negatively of myself, the rose amicably decided to stop me. She lectured me about how silly and wrong I was. She looked at me with a scowl before laughing because of the goofy faces I seem to have made. Extinguishing every last doubt about my own being, has not only been her talent, but seemingly also one of her favorite past times. This trait of her, which reminds me of the trust she puts in me, allows me to be sturdy , to appreciate and value, but most importantly feel love.